Plum Stout

blandingsThe over-sizedempress Plum product
Written in response to a lead…. which overweight Wodehouse character would I like to be..?…

Honoria chucked a riddle at me
Which Plum creature would I like to be?
The only stipulation I need to watch
Is this denizen of Plumsville must be fond of starch
I wracked the excuse I have for a mind
Stout Plum creations, in order to find
But all those large forms that occurred to me
Were characters I would hate to be
Stinker Pyke….. the name says it all!
Claude Pott… is like creatures that crawl
R Jones ….is the creepiest spy
Bickersdyke….was Red in view and eye
The Duke of Dunstable is a Royal ass!
The efficient Baxter….I will gladly pass
It looks like Plum does not agree,
With those fellow beings, on an eating spree
But no! There’s Beach! He breaks the scale
Buttling, however, is beyond my pale
Then it struck me! The Fattest of ALL!
Is an adorable creature, which holds in thrall,
An Earl, and all the County Press
I chose! I shall be the “Empress”

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7 Comments

  1. Reblogged this on ashokbhatia and commented:
    Horace Prosser (of ‘The Fat of the Land’ fame) now has competition – from the Empress of Blandings!
    Here is a weighty composition from Idyll Dreams of an Idle Fellow you may like.
    Enjoy!

    Liked by 1 person

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